Please don’t wanna pet my dog, please don’t wanna pet my dog. Oh noes, they’re stopping to pet my dog.
Succumbing to the inevitable awkward conversation that comes with petting someone’s dog, I fumble for words: “You. Like dog. You?”
That’s the trade off. To pet one’s adorable dog, one must come up with something to talk about. Anything at that moment will do. So, I rely on the answers I know people will ask:
“Oh, he’s a terrier mix.”
“Yeah, we found him on the street.”
“Yup, found him with a bullet in his foot.”
“Yes, I did just say bullet.”
“I know, people these days. Well goodbye.”
It’s nothing personal. There are no hard feelings for wanting to get out of a conversation with awkward one-line responses. Nor do these half-hearted conversations make me an introvert (or worse: a weirdo). It’s just the culture in Los Angeles.
We are essentially a “We don’t give a F- – -” culture. Tell us you hate LA because traffic sucks, the metro is useless, the people are vapid or that there’s no visible nightlife. Our response will almost always be: “that’s cool.”
(photo from our good friend) Los Angeles: Yeah, it’s alright.With the exception of the occasional “opening a door for a lady,” it’s hard to find a source of hospitality in Southern California. In fact, I’ve never heard anyone commend Angelenos for their impeccable politeness.
Yet, I think just about everyone who has grown up in the States has heard about Southern Hospitality, a charming, intangible force that seems to reside squarely in the South. Its roots may be traced to the former French colonization of the area. But, the effects are just as alive today.
Could Southern Hospitality possibly mean:
Being as sweet as honey
You know when you were younger and your grandma used to bake you cookies and call you “sweetie”? Life was good as a kid, especially because cookie jars were rarely empty at grandma’s house.
Being in the South is like being at grandma’s house around the clock. There was no shortage of “honey” and “sweetie” endearments. It was actually very charming. We felt like we were a part of a family every time we went out to eat or shopped.
Drivers actually stop their cars for pedestrians
On numerous times in Atlanta, pedestrians walked across the street and it was clearly not their turn to cross. Drivers stopped for them! And even smiled as they waved them to go across!
It could be Southern Hospitality or it could be the genuine idea of sharing the road. But, we would never attempt this in Los Angeles.
View of Downtown Atlanta from our hotel. Peachtree: this is the least common street name in Atlanta…There’s never an awkward moment in the elevator
The elevator is such an awkward modern contraption. It’s a five-by-five zone of slow, ungratifying conversation where we’re forced to make small talk or be “that guy” with our eyes glued to our shoes.
Did you know that Kathy is a teacher from Kentucky? She and her husband are in Atlanta for a teaching convention. Suzanne is also a teacher and she’s glad that I teach in such a difficult area in Los Angeles. Although, her mom isn’t doing too well these days.
We met those lovely people in the elevator and met a ton more in pretty much every elevator run in Atlanta.
People discipline their dogs
Our dog Rupert (the one with the bullet in his foot) loves his walks. But, at times, mundane walks in the park end up with a pit bull jumping on the both of us to play. Rupert is very protective of his owners and since I don’t want to cause a scene, I’ll pick him up and leave. The last time this happened, an uncontrolled and unleashed pit bull jumped on both my dog and I. In frustration, I said: “jesus christ.” The pit bull owner said the only logical response to being attacked: “actually his name is Romeo.”
Thank you, Captain Douchebag, for not reigning in your dog.
The act of disciplining your dog in Los Angeles is very rare. Dogs are treated a lot like kids here, as in they could do no wrong and nothing could possibly be their fault.
But this isn’t the same for the South. We walked past a lady whose leashed dog followed us and jumped on us. She reprimanded him profusely. This is totally a normal reaction for pet owners in the South. It’s refreshing to see that people take responsibility of raising their kids, the furry and non-furry alike.
The genuine courtesy and happiness people had really made our trips to Atlanta and New Orleans much more fun and memorable. Hey, LA, get ready to make some new friends in the elevator…sweeties.
How do you define Southern Hospitality? Ever felt awkward in the elevator?
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